Miss E has expressed already her feelings on the outcome of our glitz pageant. While I stand by the decision made by my fellow judges and me, I also recognize that I need to make amends. Since the outcome was announced, Miss E has spent her days hunkered down in the barn. Mrs. Federlin has been taking her meals since she is the only person that Miss E will currently speak to. I am pretty sure Miss E has not been spending nights in the barn only because of her strict code of hygiene does not allow for sleeping in a hayloft unless absolutely necessary.
As First Lady, and more importantly as Miss E’s best friend, I have spent the past few days trying to make it up to her. Here are a few of my tips for mounting an effective apology campaign.
- Be sincere: Look it doesn’t matter how noble the judging panel’s intentions were in giving all the girls a crown, we knew it would upset Miss E. No matter the intentions, when you hurt someone who you love, you acknowledge it. An apology means nothing if it is not sincere.
- Give them space to forgive you: You hurt their feelings and no matter how badly you feel about it, ultimately it is not about you, it’s about them. Give the person space. You are not allowed to get mad if they don’t immediately forgive you. Forgiveness is earned, not deserved.
- Bake them something: Everyone loves cookies. Miss E’s favorite cookies are chocolate, macadamia and coconut cookies. She hasn’t agreed to talk to me but she can’t resist a stack of homemade cookies!
- Promise to help sew together the glitziest show curtains for next year’s pageant: This one is kind of case-specific.
I’ve tried all of the above and I hope that Miss E can find it in her heart to forgive all of us. I think she will (if only because it is a terrible time of year to be living in a barn).