Dear Gracious Ladies, Thank you two so much for your invaluable advice to navigating the complexities of the post-apocalyptic life with poise and elegance. I have a particularly tricky question for you. How do I siphon gas like a lady? So often I get gas in my mouth, making my breath less than kissing-sweet. Can … Continue reading
Dear Gracious Ladies, My daughter hates practicing her spelling, but my survival group’s spelling bee is coming up in a few weeks. I really want her to do well, but she keeps saying that since we are living in a zombie world, why does it matter if she can win a spelling bee? What … Continue reading
You asked and we answered! Below are frequently asked questions about zombies. Q. Do zombies have food allergies? Zeds do not have food allergies. When the dead become undead, all personal qualities such as allergies, bad eyesight and favorite movies are replaced by a craving for flesh. Besides, even if you had just finished a … Continue reading
Dear Gracious Ladies, I live in a safe house with a small group of survivors, and we have a birthday coming up! I would love to make a cake or other delicious, fancy dessert for the surprise party, but my recipes from the old days all involve electric mixers and many ingredients. Do you have … Continue reading
Dear Gracious Ladies, I would love some advice on critter care. The darn zombie dogs keep attacking my chickens. Thanks! Ms. Cav Dear Ms. Cav, Thank you so much for your question! I have some good news for you: these chicken-murdering dogs are not undead, they are merely rabid. As far as we can tell, … Continue reading
Dear Gracious Ladies, Ok, I’ll admit it, I can’t go it alone. My plan was perfect: stay alone, stay mobile, stay alive. But, it hasn’t worked. I got weary of eating squirrel every night (although I believe my cholesterol is now completely under control!), and have since then considered recruiting up a couple men to … Continue reading
Hi Mrs. K and Miss E, So I was running away from this zombie the other day, when I happened to look back and it was like slow motion. She was the most beautiful zombie I had ever seen. Her pigtails were swaying back and forth as she continued her effortless march towards me. I … Continue reading
Hi Mrs. K and Miss E, What are some great dating ideas/suggestions? Going to the movies, getting dinner at a nice restaurant, picnic in a park, etc. all seem like a luxury of the past. What are some fun activities we can engage in as couples?Thank you! Your handbook is awesome and I look forward … Continue reading
Dear Miss E. and Mrs K., Thanksgiving is only a week away and I’ve never dressed a turkey, let alone decorated for a post-zombie world holiday. Can you offer some advice for how to find, kill, and prepare a bird for dinner? Are there acceptable substitutes? Any other suggestions for a festive meal, centerpieces, and … Continue reading
Gracious Living in a Zombie World: A Ladies’ Handbook 